Saturday, January 07, 2006


Court called my cell phone while I was hangin' with Miss Anna tonight (which was way fun, I must say--finally saw Narnia, was amazed, and will now recommend it to everyone!, had a yummy margarita and am feelin' good). . .anyway, Court called tonight to tell me that while she was outside in the back having a cigarette, the neighbor behind us was shining a flashlight over the fence into our yard and into the neighboring yards. "Uh, ma'm," he said to Court, "Someone just tried to break into my house and he might be in your backyard."

What the hell??

That might explain the sight I came upon while upon looking outside a few days ago: the overturned chair, the can of bug spray knocked over, and the crumpled door mat. This freaked me out a little bit. And let's not forget the random thumps we've heard in and outside of the house lately. I've decided that these mishaps couldn't have been committed solely by the dang stray cat who lives under our shed. Nope. I bet this burglar has been lurking for a few days now. Or at least, the paranoid part of my head thinks this.

But you know what? I'm not scared at all. Actually, when I got home, I went directly outside, stood in the front yard for a minute and looked around. I even muttered to myself, "I'm gonna kick some a**." No fear, Lauren is here! Who knows where this "tough guy" mood came from? Maybe because I've had a margarita (oftentimes that's enough) or maybe because I'm not all alone (that's probably the real reason--Court and I are holding down the fort together!). Regardless, I'm fearless and ready to fend off the predator!

. . .for now, anyway. When bedtime rolls around, I might be singing a different tune. We've locked all the windows and doors. We've checked the outside of the house. I think Court and I might even go for a walk tonight around the neighborhood. . .just, you know, to strut our stuff a little, scare the you-know-what out of whoever might be thinking of robbing us. We're tough, you know.

Still, please say prayers if you're reading this. Because even tough girls need prayers. :)



Blogger Huw said...

You know, if you need me to come over there and bash some heads in I can be there in about an hour.

That offer stands for tonight only though alas...

7:09 PM  
Blogger Lauren said...

Thanks, Huw! Too bad you're not going to be here longer. . .

Have a safe trip and I do hope to see you again someday soon!

7:40 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

A few things:

#1, first and foremost...Damn that's creepy!

Okay, second: I just ordered you a Super Soaker and a Tazer from Send me pictures.

10:44 AM  
Blogger trishy said...

Be careful. I'm a little weirded out for you. Any news on the situation?

7:18 AM  
Blogger Me Over Here said...

Yeah, caution girlie. Call me if you need some backup. I'm small but squirmy.

10:05 AM  
Blogger Rob West said...

I'll bet Lauren can kick some ass.


I am so turned on right now...

10:08 AM  
Blogger sarah said...

Yikes!! Be careful, keep your phone on ya...

11:42 AM  
Blogger Leslie said...

I'm not sure why a potential burglar would make a mess of your porch. That's odd, and to me it says one thing: drugs!

Which means you should watch out, because who knows what this person will do.

Does my picture make it seem like I'm yelling my comments?

1:20 PM  
Blogger Lauren said...

Yes, Leslie, your picture totally makes it look like you're yelling your comments! Love it.

And you're right--why the heck would a burglar mess up my porch? Just for laughs? To throw me off a little? Hmmm. Actually, we have long suspected the guys behind us (from whom this whole scare started) to be druggies. Our evidence is not very firmly grounded--we just hear a lot of coughing and a lot of random people gathered in the backyard. But hey, I wouldn't be surprised. Which is why I wonder if the burglar was just wanting some drugs? Poor guy. He (she?) was simply in withdrawal and stumbling around on my porch for a little while. There you have it. *mind at ease*

2:06 PM  
Blogger Granny Annie said...

You need some grandmotherly advice. Report this to the police. That is what they are for. Don't think it is silly or that they will accuse you of taking up their time. Who knows, they may be looking for someone and you can help others with this information. Also, they might just add you to their list for a closer watch and an extra drive by. Your woman's intuition is telling you something and you can't just laugh it off. My children could tell you what a nervous nellie I am when it comes to safety. Just f.y.i. because I care.

6:23 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home