Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Gotta Stay Fly

Yesterday after work I went for a run around the neighborhood. It was refreshing. Nothing like your favorite tunes in your ear (last night it was a little bit of Coldplay, Damien Rice, and of course Ciara & Luda) to distract you from the fact that your lungs feel like ice. I have shin splints today, so that's a yucky side-effect. Hopefully this running thing will become more of a routine now that my life is somewhat back on track. I go thru phases where I'll run a lot, then all of the sudden quit for a while. So yeah. Here's to Exercise Lauren!

While running, I saw some more of those new Christmas yard decorations-- the life-size snow globe (although it's not really "life-size" at all because life-size for a snow globe would be. . .smaller. But it's human-sized, I guess) that blows fake snow around inside. Have you seen them? Trish and I first noticed them at Wal-Mart. Anyway, I think they're kinda fun. Some people I know think they're tacky. Oh, well. To each his own.

Also while running, I watched people and observed normal neighborhood happenings. Now, I've looked forward to living in a real neighborhood ever since I started living on my own. There's just something about having kids and dogs and families around that makes me happy. Of course, my dream was to be friends with all the kids on the block--I imagined them running up to me and thinking I was so cool, then I'd say, "Come on in--want some cookies?" As I'm writing this out, I sound like the Scary Lady on the block. But I swear in my head it was cool. Anyway, that hasn't happened here yet. That's okay, though. Back to the point of this paragraph: I was looking at some of the houses around here and imagining what it will someday be like to come home and curl up on the couch with my husband, talk about our day, drink a glass of wine, etc. The houses looked so warm and couple-y. It's those everyday aspects of marriage that I look forward to probably more than any other part.

Which leads me to my next recent revelation: I am so content with my life right now. While I do still long for the same things I always have--a husband and a family--the longing is definitely tempered. And the only explanation I have for that is that time is, indeed, a wonderful thing. The longer I am single, the more okay with it, the more happy with it, I am. Does it mean I have entirely stopped looking for the man of my dreams? Um, NO WAY. :) I still notice guys, still wonder where and when I'll meet Mr. Perfect-for-Me. . .yet I find myself totally okay with my single status in a way I haven't been before. It's a wonderful feeling. And as I've talked to some of my friends about it, I'm thinking it's a God thing--that it has something to do with the fact that I'm leaving TX in six months. . .what's the point of starting a relationship right now, anyway? And it's not like I'm meeting tons of prospects, either. :) In that sense, I'm looking forward to going back to school and meeting new people.

Now, I say all this at 24 years old. . .who knows what I'll be saying once I've been single for five years, the godmother to all my friends' children, still wondering when it will be my turn? But for now, I can honestly say God has worked on my heart and given me a ton of peace with where I am. And I can't complain.





And all the clouds don't ever change
the shape of who I am to You.
~JoC

10 Comments:

Blogger Chris said...

I totally dig you on this!

Despite my sporadic whinings about girlfriends, I also realize that the longer I am single, the more comfortable I become. It's almost like taking off your shoes at the end of a hard day and saying, "Man, that feels good." Yet, also like you, it's not like I've given up hope on finding Ms. Thang (the female equivalent of Mr. Right) - but I really feel that I'm in such a constant stage of development and transition right now that it seems a bit unfair for myself and for whoever I might date to be side-tracked by becoming unremittingly romantically involved - as I would - while I am still developing. [Why, that possibly deserve a bra joke.] I'm up to a 32B! [Okay, enough boob humor.]

It doesn't mean that I'm not without my "things" even now, but at least I've learned where to draw the line and keep certain friendships at just that...friendships...since I'm fairly certain my future wife will probably be one of my closest friends to begin with.

*raises wine glass to you*

Here's to the single life!

7:11 PM  
Blogger Lauren said...

Amen, Brotha Cap'n! And I'm of the same opinion--that my future husband will be, first and foremost, one of my very best friends. And yeah, it doesn't mean that I don't pity myself sometimes with a whiny thought when I'm around couples (i.e., "I wish I had someone to hold my hand," etc.). . .but I also know that so much has happened in my life in the last year and a half of singlehood that probably wouldn't have happened had I been involved with someone--so I'm lovin' it!

9:45 PM  
Blogger Becky said...

To the Wind Beneath my Wings.
First off: way to go! (on running) my excercise consists of walking up and down my apartment stairs a couple times a day...and I'm OK with that.

As for the single life. I love getting to do what I want, when I want. Although it gets lonely at times...I think we should cherish the solidarity because once a husband and kids come along there won't be any.
I think this calls for a long night of dancing sometime...soon. Show off our hottness and then rub it in some guys faces...or something to that extent.

See you later.

7:06 AM  
Blogger Lauren said...

oooh, I like it, Becks. Nights out are always good.

And you're right--I've talked to lots of women who practically implore me to WAIT and be patient about getting married. . .after all, when will we ever have this freedom again??

7:28 AM  
Blogger trishy said...

Lauren, my dear, you've come a long way and I rejoice in that!

I'm with you on the "cookie lady" thing though I do also see the scary lady conotation. I tend to think we'll both be that lady someday.

As for the snowglobe, I didn't say it was tacky did I? I think they are funny. Not necessarily my style, but pretty darn cool just the same!

8:35 AM  
Blogger Lauren said...

no, Trish, you and I both thought the snow globes were cool. One of my kids, though, thinks they're horrendously ugly. Oh, well.

8:42 AM  
Blogger Becky said...

I too have been told to wait as long as possible before settling down. Which is fine by me. That way I can get some traveling in...although we still need to find some boyfriends to take to Key West!!

9:37 AM  
Blogger Rob West said...

It's funny how you always want a relationship until you get one, and then you're like,

"Oh...yeah...I forgot about all this crap."
And your enthusiasm makes the sound of a balloon deflating rapidly.

On another related topic, I think Christmas is the one time of year when it's ok to be tacky. Not necessarily straight up ugly, but why the hell not hang colored blinking lights all over your life-sized manger scene?

10:01 AM  
Blogger Me Over Here said...

Wow, so much to say here! Lauren, I am very much with you here. I was always the "girl who had to have a boyfriend", and I wasn't okay with being by myself. I never bought into that whole "discover yourself" crap (I KNOW who I am, thank you very much), but as I was forced to be single for a while, I started understanding what everyone meant by that. Pretty soon, I was just fine with hanging out by myself, seeing movies solo, spending a good night with an awesome movie and my puppy. Now, my circumstances are a bit different. I am in a committed relationship that I love, but my darling boy is far, far away. In a way, this is a blessing, because it still affords me the time to hang out with my friends and not create the "third wheel" situation, but I can still "come home" to My Brit everyday, and feel so...well, at home.

You know what else this means, right? I'm TOTALLY inviting myself to join you and Becksters for a night 'o' dancing.

Um, and I LOVE the snowglobes. I, too, saw them in Walmart, where my sissy and I pointed and said "ooooooooh" for about 2 minutes. Ah, to live the rich life.

You keep up the exercise and I will too. A pact of sorts.

7:54 PM  
Blogger Lauren said...

Mo, I'm with ya. I was always the same way--"I don't need time for myself, I'm perfectly aware of who I am and what I need, blah blah blah"--but this time has totally shown me a lot about myself, some of which I'd never have noticed before.

And my goodness, YES, you're TOTALLY coming out with us. . .SOON! Did you get my e-mail about hanging out??

8:48 AM  

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