Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Shadows of leaves dance across my sea
And they remind me not to fall, but to keep my peace
It's not easy, I know you agree
Your wish, your wish
A quiet afternoon
For you, for you I'm silencing the world
For you.

Check out my high school buddies, Zen Withstanding. I think they're amazing. If you like indie music, I think you'll agree with me.

Monday, August 29, 2005

Quick Fix

Audrey came over for dinner tonight and it was way fun to see her. I haven't seen her since May. We cooked (well, she did most of it) an awesome vegetarian dish. It was yummy! With food like that, I could go without meat. But I don't know how long I'd last. . .We also flipped thru our junior high yearbook and laughed at ourselves and our classmates. You don't quite realize the value of a yearbook until years later. :)

In other news, I talked to Carmack today! He called me at work, which was such a surprise. Lisa, our wonderful secretary, says, "Lauren, Line 1" and I pick up in the usual way, expecting possibly a salesperson (yes, churches get inundated with sales calls, too), "This is Lauren." And I hear, "L.D.!" It was hilarious. Very fun to catch up with him. Isn't it cool when friends randomly think to call you out of the blue like that? A lot of times I'll think of someone and say to myself, "Oooh, I need to call him/her" but then think of all the other stuff I need to do. Most of the people I want to talk to would require a good half-hour conversation at least, so it's easy to push it to the side and wait for another day. But I may not get another day to call these people. So I should take advantage of the time I'm given.

Mandy from camp called this weekend, too, and that was another fun surprise. Life is crazy and it's nice to talk to people who agree with me on that! :)

Becca and Mo spent the weekend with us, and Dad came in for a day, too. Busy weekend, but lots of fun.

Beth Marie is leaving. I'm really going to miss her. . .for some reason, I feel like I'm particularly going to miss her laugh. It just kinda rings out in the office and always makes me laugh along with her. Hmmmm. Sad.

It's been a thought-provoking day, an uncomfortable day in some ways. I'm uncomfortable with a reaction I've experienced within myself. I talked with Court and Em, though, and who better to talk to on a day like this than my two very best friends? I'm thankful for their wise words and their knowledge of me. It's funny how they both just happen to be around to talk right when I need them most. . .

Okay, I'm tired. To bed I said!


Wow. I now know how it feels.

Sometimes you think you're totally ready for it, totally okay with it. . .

But then you hear it.

and for a second. . .

. . .it feels like you were never okay with it at all.

How long before I get in
Before it starts, before I begin?
How long before you decide
Before I know what it feels like?
Where to, where do I go?

Thursday, August 25, 2005

I love Jane!

The Halvorsens and me. Oh, I will miss them. . .

American Idol Audition Pics

Each "cubicle" had 2 judges. As many as 12 people were auditioning at the same time at any time.

We stood, four in a row (I'm right under the number 11 in this picture), and sang for about 20 seconds each. Notice how we're only separated from the other contestants by a curtain! It was hard to concentrate.

The stadium was packed!

Idol Day

Well, I did it. And I'm proud of myself for doing something I had always thought about doing. I know that if I hadn't done it, I'd regret it at some point. Obviously, I didn't make it to the second round of auditions, which I wasn't really expecting, anyway. There were some AWESOME singers there. I bet all of the people who showed up have been in choir just like I have. . .and the ones who made it past the first round had amazing voices. I realized as I sat there in the auditorium (for 7 hours--lots of time to think and observe people and the process) that "show business" isn't my thing. Even if I had, by some odd chance, made it to the second round, I would've quickly grown tired of the attitudes and philosophies of the entertainment business. So it was a fun experience. . .definitely worthwhile. I had so many voicemails from friends, family, people at work, and my kids today wishing me luck. It was sweet. We had a staff dinner tonight in honor of Beth Marie and Steve had me sing in front of the whole group! aaaah. We weren't alone in the restaurant, either. It was funny. Today was one of those days when you realize how many people care about you and love you--regardless of the fact that you took an entire day off of work to audition for something very far-fetched. ;)

Know that you are loved.

For you, there'll be no cryin'
For you, the sun will be shinin'
'Cause I feel that when I'm with you it's alright.
I know it's right.
~Eva Cassidy

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

A I 5

You know you're old when you can't even think of how old you're going to be on your next birthday. Ugh. I was talking to someone yesterday about birthdays and thinking, "Wait. . .am I already 24? No, I'm going to be 24. . ." Annoying.

In other, less depressing news: I'm auditioning for American Idol tomorrow. ha ha, what a nerd I am! :) I felt so silly going up to get my wristband yesterday with Leah. But hey, you can audition up until you're 28, so I'm not that old. Anyway, now I have a lovely neon green wristband with AMERICAN IDOL scrawled all over it. I'm not anticipating anything to come of it--it's just something I've always thought about doing and I think it'd be fun (and I'll probably see and meet some interesting people). Martha's coming with me to pass the time. I'm already getting kinda nervous. aaaaah!

Leah and I watched Diary of a Mad Black Woman the other night. . .that's a GREAT movie! You should all see it. Hilarious.

Okay, I'm out. Hope you're all doing well and feeling well and living well.

It's funny how we feel so much, but cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we can't be heard
~Sarah McLachlan

Monday, August 22, 2005


I love days off. I have tons to do in the house, and I know it won't all get done today (does it ever?), but it's so nice to have a day to at least start. I feel like I haven't had a day at home to really start checking things off my list. Today is that day. :)

I met some way cool people this past week--yay for new friends. . .you can never have enough.

Speaking of friends, I miss my old ones, too. . .Becca and Mo are visiting this weekend, though, so that will be fun! I'm having an itch for a party with my TLU buds. Maybe I'll throw one sometime soon. . .

Leah and I went to Wal Mart today and there were so many college kids shopping for their dorm rooms. . .oh, the memories. :)

Sorry this is a boring post. Have a good one!

Miles and miles of telephone poles
Fallen and tossed around
I can't talk to you anymore
And I miss you

Friday, August 19, 2005

Oh my gosh, advertising has entered the blogging world via comments. This is ridiculous. Stupid. And really annoying.

Headed to SA to see Miriam and Scott today. Actually, they're not in SA anymore, but close to it. Should be a fun time.

Tomorrow's a LONNNNNG day.

I love getting in touch with old friends! MySpace is a cool little thingy. Talking to high school friends is so fun. . .in 5 years, so much has changed, and yet some things never change. :)

Love to all.

I remember when I'd run to you
Through fields of white flowers
Your embrace was my air
How I needed you there
All of the world and all of its powers
Couldn't keep your love from me

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

I love my job. Annie just came by to visit for a little bit and I'm reminded of how awesome it is to have the kids come by just to chat in the office with me. How cool is that? They could be anywhere, but they stop by church to talk to me and the pastors.

I love my job. I just got off the phone with a lady who's intimidated to teach the 6th grade class, but sees an amazing opportunity in it at the same time. After discussing it (and explaining that we ALL feel intimidated by the questions adolescents can pose), she agreed to try it out and I can't wait to see how God will use her this year!

I love my job. I have become involved in more "extra" work this year than ever before--I'm writing the small group curriculum for the senior high gathering, and I'm teaching 8th grade confirmation while we wait for a new pastor. It's a bit scary and I honestly don't know why I agreed to some of it, but I know it will get done and it adds to my experience.

Sometimes I feel tired, frustrated, annoyed, frazzled, over-worked, under-appreciated. . .

but then I am reminded why I love my job.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

I love Leah's face in this picture. . .this is @ Taco Cabana after a day of tubing in NB (Em's with us, too, but she's taking the picture).

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Comfortable Excitement

Ah, I love being home. Even though it's been a short visit, it's been (as usual) just what I needed. I spent a lot of time with Dad today--just me and him. It was really nice. I love riding around with him in the car, listening & singing along with George Strait. And the traditional dinner @ Rocco's with Mom & Mike is something I will always love, too. And naps at home. Nothing to do but be with my family. It's one of the best things in life, I think.

I got to hang out with Todd last night, which was. . .memorable. ;)

Whatever happens-- happens.

Tomorrow's a big day on the lake with my church kids!

Stay cool, friends!

There's a shortcut to the highway out of town
Why don't you take it
Don't let that speed limit slow ya down
Go on and break it.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Are we hot or are we hot? :)

Becky found me a pirate! :)

That's us way up in the air! The view was awesome.

Taking off on a parasail adventure!

Aaaaah, what are those things behind me? I'm clueless.

Ooooh, aren't drag queens hot?? ha ha This was a bit crazy. And I'm jealous that these guys have nicer butts and thighs than I ever will. :)

I Heart KW

Wow, Key West was SO FUN!! Becky and I had a blast, even though there were a few minor setbacks (running across an entire airport only to find that we'd just missed a connecting flight, for example). Highlights for me include, but are not limited to:
* parasailing! I was afraid, but I conquered my fears for Becky's birthday and it was way cool.
* meeting the producer of MTV's Real World. Yep, we sat right next to him at a bar and chatted for a lot of the evening. Becky talked to him way more than I did, and he only told us he was "in entertainment," but he'd mentioned that he'd just been in Austin for a few months and I thought, "You know, wouldn't that be funny if he was with MTV". . .and our bartender friend told us later that indeed he was! How crazy. Too bad we didn't get a picture.
* our schedule was very free--if we were tired of walking around, we took naps at our hotel. If we wanted to sit and have a Coke overlooking the ocean, we did it. It's fun to take vacations with friends, especially friends who are like yourself. We generally like the same things and dislike the same things, so it was easy to have fun together!
* Night life in Key West is ridiculous! Bars are open til 4 AM, you can walk around with a beer in your hand, the t-shirt shops are chock full of crude slogans, bongs are on display everywhere you look. . .it was a different world. And we were of course always asked the question, "So, where do you work?" which led to interesting conversations.
* I love pirates. I don't know where it came from, but I suddenly have a fascination with learning about pirates. What a nerd!
* The wedding we attended was beautiful--very small and right on the ocean.
* We met some cool people. . .it's interesting how many people graduate college and just up and move somewhere to work at a bar or play music or whatever. I began to think my life was boring, but have since decided that my life is just fine the way it is. And the same goes for other, more adventurous lives. We're all different. Plus, even if I DID decide to do something crazy like that, those of you who know me know that I'd probably get homesick and regretful of my decision after a mere month!

Pictures are posted above. Enjoy!

Have a good one.

Sarah McLachlan: Push

I want to dance to this song at my wedding. :)
Everytime i look at you the world just melts away
All my troubles, all my fears dissolve in your affections
You see me at my weakest but you take me as i am
And when i fall you offer me a softer place to land

You stay the course, you hold the line you keep it all together
You're the one true thing i know i can believe in
You're all the things that i desire you save me, you complete me
You're the one true thing i know i can believe

I get mad so easy but you give me room to breathe
No matter what i say or do 'cause you're too good to fight about it
Even when i have to push just to see how far you'll go
You wont stoop down to battle but you'll never turn to go

You stay the course, you hold the line you keep it all together
You're the one true thing i know i can believe in
You're all the things that i desire you save me, you complete me
You're the one true thing i know i can believe

There are times I cant decide when i cant tell up from down
You make me feel less crazy otherwise i'd drown
But you pick me up and brush me off and tell me I'm ok
sometimes thats just what we need to get us through the day

You stay the course, you hold the line you keep it all together
You're the one true thing i know i can believe in
You're all the things that i desire you save me, you complete me
You're the one true thing i know i can believe

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Swallowed in the Sea

Off to Key West tomorrow!!! Can't wait. I need to get packin'. . .I always seem to put that off. . . Please pray for Becky and me as we travel this weekend.

Talked to Court tonight for a little while--I've really missed her lately. I've been needing to hear her wise words.

I miss Lee-lee, too! I'm so excited for the three of us to live together soon.

You know that shirt that pre-teen girls wear that has BOYS LIE emblazoned on the front? Well, I find that statement to be quite true lately. ha ha

Well that’s where I belong and you belong with me
and I could write it down or spread it all around
Get lost and then get found or swallowed in the sea

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Our FANTASTIC group of hikers. What a beautiful day!

Janie and I at the top of the peak. I wore a smile for the picture, but wasn't entirely too happy because I knew that the challenge was only half finished--I somehow had to get down. Janie helped me all the way, though. When I reached the top, I yelled, "I OWN THIS MOUNTAIN!!" That's right, mountain. I totally conquered you. :)

We were above the clouds!

I spent time by myself at this spot just thinking and praying. Now everytime I need to "escape," I close my eyes and let my mind take me back to this place.

This is part of a panoramic shot I took. We spent a whole afternoon just lounging with this incredible view all around us.

Leah and I after we got down from the peak. I'm smiling really big because I was relieved and proud to be off the peak. :)

Coldplay: Fix You

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
when you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

I have a theory that Chris Martin wrote this song for his baby girl, Apple. And today it hit home for me with my dad because he's always there when boys make me cry, when I'm struggling with big life decisions, when I don't understand the world or people. . .thanks Dad. :) This is such a sweet song. I absolutely LOVE Coldplay. Can't say it enough.