Friday, April 29, 2005

Quote of the Day

And what happens when you're on the fence?
You get splinters in your butt!
~N.C. Dow, on his daughter classifying her political views as "neither conservative nor liberal" and preferring to align herself "in the middle"

Goodness, my father is SUCH a dork. But he's funny. :)

Thursday, April 28, 2005

Random thoughts that come when I'm holed up in an office with no windows. . .

As much as I've complained in the past about Texas and hot weather, I've realized that I really do love the fact that in April, I can lay out by the pool, read a book, and soak up the sun. Granted, April isn't nearly as hot as August. . .but whatever. I can't wait to be home with my family this weekend. My plan is to spend Saturday afternoon outside by the pool with Leah and Emily. . .hope the weather holds up.

Lately I've discovered that one of my absolute favorite places to be is the beach. There's nothing like laying on the sand and listening to the waves. . .doing nothing at all. . .just laying there. It's one of life's greatest pleasures to me. I haven't even been to the beach in six months, but I've really been missing it lately.

Let's go! :)

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

(church friends and me) I think this is such a cute picture. . .not really my best picture, but everyone else looks good. Posted by Hello

Miriam and I "kiss the bride" (Martha) Posted by Hello

Goodness Knows

Mmmm. . .Jack Johnson playing in the office. . .now that's what I call a great day at work. :)

The preschool has a petting zoo outside today and I honestly could spend all day out there if I could! Feeding bottles to piglets, petting bunnies, laughing at clumsy baby goats. . .and the best part is watching the little kids play with the animals (and hearing "be gentle" from the teachers every five seconds). :) Little kids interacting with animals is probably one of the most enjoyable things to watch. . .they're both such innocent creatures and they just don't know how cute they are.

Snow Patrol rocks. I got the CD yesterday in the mail. And I love it. This seems like a year of good music. . .I can't remember a year that I've been surrounded by better music. (Besides the year I was introduced to Jimmy Eat World.) But all this indie stuff I've learned about this year is blowing me away. And I'm sure there's more to come. . .it's funny to me how people's musical tastes can be so different. Some of music's "classics" I just don't get into. And some of my music doesn't do it for some people (I know, I know, I will never understand why my dad doesn't like rap! What is wrong with him, anyway? ha ha). It's interesting. And it doesn't stop with music. Food's another one that intrigues me. I LOVE sour cream and others hate it. . .and I HATE olives and others love them (like the time Courtney bought a huge jar of olives in college. . .yuck!).

I had dinner with Becky last night and I just love that girl. It's cool how our friendship has grown and continues to grow. Good times!

Alright. Janie and I are going to work on the senior video. Peace.

What have I done? It's too late for that.
What have I become? Truth is, nothing yet.

Sunday, April 24, 2005

One of my seniors, after having only known me for a year and a half, announced at worship this evening that I have been a powerful force in his life. If that's not the sweetest and most meaningful thing I've heard in a long time, I don't know what is. If that's not a blatant sign from God that relationships are never coincidental, I don't know what is.

WOW. I never would've imagined hearing that a year ago. I never would've guessed the amount of love that I have experienced in this place to which I am called.

Glory, Glory, Hallelujah!

My goodness, YOUTH SUNDAY rocked--thanks to the awesome youth of SOTH!!!! I'm so proud of them. And the coolest part of it, I think, was the fact that it was very real. I got so many compliments on the authenticity of the kids sharing their faith in real life. They dug deep into issues that we all struggle with--stress, relationships, life with parents, etc.--and though they couldn't necessarily answer the questions they raised, they were able to see and explain how God abides in and through it all. It was inspiring. God has me where I am for a reason. . .at times like these, it's very clear as to why.

I had a fun weekend. I spent the night with Court on Thursday night and on Friday we went swimming in the pool of a random apartment complex. Court's friend's sister lives there, so we had the right to swim there, didn't we? ;) It was fun. And I bought a cute black swimsuit (I know, I know, spending more money isn't good. . .but every girl needs a cute black swimsuit, just like she needs a cute black dress, cute black shoes, cute black pants. . .the list goes on. . .). Then yesterday Martha got married to Matthew and that was way fun, too. I saw some friends from TLU and hung out with Miriam and Scott. The margarita I had was pretty dang strong, too. I told Trey I'm going to become the notorious single girl who gets drunk at friends' weddings, grabs the mic, and goes off on how horrible men are. Can't you just see it now? Beware, men everywhere! ha ha ;) Yeah, right, I can't picture myself doing that. So maybe that's why it's so funny to me.

Okay, time for a quick nap before the parents' dinner tonight! I'm exhausted.


a verse from one of our Youth Sunday hymns that struck me:
In the beauty of the lilies Christ was born across the sea,
With a glory in his bosom that transfigures you and me.
As he died to make men holy, let us live to make men free,
While God is marching on.
Glory, glory, Hallelujah!
~Battle Hymn of the Republic

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

I like listening to classical music in my office. It completely changes my attitude and makes the atmosphere much more relaxed. Yet another goal: more music in office.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Black Balloon

I just had dinner with John, Marcy, and Jane. . .fun times, dude. I needed that. This week has been stressful. At one point today, my computer was being so obstinate and was totally screwing up the bulletin I was working on. . .I was seriously about to throw my chair against the wall and shove all of my papers off of my desk. I shut my door and just cried for a few minutes, asking God for help. After that, I sat down at the computer, and of course everything worked fine. Hmmm. . .I think God was helping out on that one. . .and I think I just needed to let out some steam.

I went to the doctor today and had an EKG. My heart has been acting kinda funky lately, so I wanted to get it checked out. Doctors' offices are kinda scary to me. I don't go that often (thankfully), so while I was sitting all by myself waiting for the EKG results, my mind started to wander. I began to think about people who get really sad news at the doctor's office. . .how doctors break the news to patients who have terminal illnesses. . .how one minute, everything in someone's life can be totally normal and the next, one's whole world can be turned upside down with the news that everything is not normal--that something in the body isn't working properly and may never work properly again. I wondered how I would feel if the doctor came in and said she had some concerns and wanted more tests run, or if she said I needed surgery, or if she said that it looked like something serious. Our bodies can be really fragile. It amazes me that my heart has been pumping for 23 years straight. I'm thankful to God for my health, but I don't want to take it for granted.

By the way, the EKG came back normal. I breathe a sigh of relief. . .and a prayer of thanks. Those of you who know me know that I can get pretty paranoid about stuff, so I'm glad I have some answers now.

So I'm starting a new trend--I'm going into work earlier so I can leave earlier in the afternoon. My logic is this: I registered for my first grad school course (Developmental Issues in Counseling Children, Adolescents, and Adults--so excited about this one!) that will start in the fall. The church office is generally quieter in the morning hours, so I can get more work done with less distractions (although distractions are ministry, and many times, these distractions prove to be the more important part of the job. . .). Then, in the afternoons, I can work on papers, studying, etc. for school. I'm usually up at church most evenings, anyway, so I think I can work it all in. We'll see. . .it's funny how quickly I've gotten out of the whole 'waking up early' schedule. But my aim is to try it and hopefully I'll be in the habit by the time fall rolls around.

Dad's coming Thursday night for dinner to celebrate Barrett's birthday! Yay! I still can't believe my brother is 21 now. Wow.

Good evening, friends.

Comin' down the years turn over
And angels fall without you there
And I'll go on and I'll lead you home and
All because
I'll become
What you became to me
~Goo Goo Dolls

Sunday, April 17, 2005

My Linguistic Profile:
65% General American English
30% Dixie
5% Upper Midwestern
0% Midwestern
0% Yankee

What kind of English do YOU speak??

Song recommendation: Ben Folds, The Luckiest. My sister says this might be the sweetest love song she's ever heard. I'd have to agree.

Janie made a video of all of our youth activities from the past year and it is SWEET! I'm so excited for everyone to see it. Watching it brings tears to my eyes. . .and it also reminds me that there have been some awesome things going on at SOTH, even if I forget it or don't necessarily see it for myself all the time. The DVD is fantastic--looks like it was done by a pro. We're also doing one for the seniors. It's so cool when people use their talents for church stuff. . .I could never put together what Jane has--plus, it's special because it's from her. Awesome stuff.

Peter, you just owned that brownie.

Saturday, April 16, 2005

Becca and me Posted by Hello


I love traveling! Even if it's just to Houston, I absolutely love it. I love driving with friends and chatting about anything and everything, visiting friends whom I miss so very much, shopping, eating out, shopping, and eating out! :)

I think I had a mini-awakening while I was in Houston this weekend. Watching and hearing about other couples made me think a lot. A relationship's just not for me right now. I kinda enjoy being on the "sidelines" and observing others. . .I learn a lot and reflect a lot on what I know, what I've learned, who I was, and who I am becoming. Shopping for bridesmaid dresses and helping my girlfriends pick out decorations and other miscellaneous wedding things is always going to be kinda rough, I think, while I'm single. And I don't think I'm weird for feeling that way--there's just something about being a girl that makes that longing for marriage very real. . .especially when your friends are planning for a step in life that you're just not ready for. At one time, I thought I was ready. Now I know I'm not. And you know, I think it'll be fun to take my time because I know my friends will give me the same attention, the same excitement that I'm giving them. It's just what girls do for each other. Engagements and weddings are an interesting phenomenon to me. . .girls rally together and plan parties and buy outrageous gifts--and you don't care how much money you spend because ". . .it's (insert name of girlfriend here)'s wedding! She's getting married!" Although, Becca's is only the second wedding I will actually be in, so my spending limit might shrink after the tenth wedding. ;) But it's annoying to me that even through the excitement, there's a tiny tiny tiny bit of sadness. . .or maybe it's just a whisper of the question, "When will this be me?" I find myself wondering if a man will ever love me the way my friends are loved by their significant others--so completely, boldly, and confidently. (Note: provided, of course, that I love him the same way.) I think society has trained girls to be wrapped up in weddings, though, and to base our worth on whether or not a man proposes to us. . .and I wish I could break that mold! I think I'm going to try. :)

Plus, I'm gorgeous and I'm a really fun person! ;) Single girls, remember how awesome and desirable we are and don't doubt this truth for one second! (Easier said than done. . .)

I put a couple of pictures on here from Houston. It was so wonderful to see my friends. . .at times like this, I really wish we all lived in the same city. Because even though we're only 3 hours away from each other, it's rare that we get together. Maybe it would be the same way, though, if we were closer. . .I guess that's life after college, but I think that's unfair. :(

Have a good one, kids. Time to unpack, lounge, and go to bed early. This will be a BIG week. . .

All my life
Is changing everyday
In every possible way
And all my dreams
It's never quite as it seems
Never quite as it seems
~The Cranberries

The best kind of love is the no-matter-what kind.
~Inventing the Abbotts

Miriam, Trish, Becca, me Posted by Hello

Thursday, April 14, 2005


Well the last couple of posts have been pretty depressing, I must say! But that's life--ups and downs and weird feelings and "right" feelings. . .I'm glad that the funk wears off eventually.

Anyway, I'm on the upside of things now. Becky and I just hung out tonight and it's always fun to hang with her. We had planned to go to a happy hour thing. . .but we got stuck at Old Navy (I didn't buy anything--I'm so proud!) and then decided to eat out instead. We went to Hula Hut. Yes! And all the places on the lake were so crowded. It was crazy. After dinner, we were wanting to hear Rodger Wilko because (why else?) we think the lead singer is pretty hot. :) But when we finally found the bar, they were finished playing and we felt like total nerds. It was like a hidden bar. Seriously, it was kinda weird. So what did we end up doing? Driving around! We're idiots, but it was fun to listen to hip-hop in the car and laugh about what dorks we are. We've found another reason why we miss college: it seemed like, in college, there were always people to call to hang out with. . .when you live in a community like that, you're never really "alone". . .at least, for the most part. But now, it's like it's just me and Becky, or me and whoever else. . .and we don't have a "group" here. I wish I had a group of guys and girls I could hang out with. That's what I miss. And of course I DO have my group. . .but they're all scattered now and probably always will be. Sad.

I'm headed to Houston tomorrow to see Beckers, Trish, and Lindsey! Miriam and I are driving down together, which will be fun. I'm excited to see my Houston friends--I don't get to Houston nearly as often as I'd like to. This weekend's task at hand: bridesmaid dresses for Becca's wedding! Crazy crazy.

Alright, I'm out. Have a great weekend. Oh, and if you haven't already, check out Friendster: Becky's definitely getting some action on there, so I recommend it if you're single and looking! :) Although I haven't received any messages from guys. . .go figure! But hey, give it a shot. If my dad's on it, it's gotta be cool, right? :)

Slow down everyone
You're moving too fast

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Yuck Yuck

Oh my gosh, does it ever end? I feel like I'm drowning in all the "stuff" I have to do, not to mention I feel kinda lost today. One of my best friends called and left a message and I realized that I'm kinda mad at her. I'm mad because we hardly ever actually talk to each other and she doesn't make much of an effort to keep in touch. I'm mad because at one time, she was the one I turned to and now I feel like I don't have anybody.

I know I have people to turn to, but I'm just not feeling it right now. I'm feeling kind of abandoned by several people in my life. It's weird. There aren't really words for it, but I will say this--it's sad and it feels like crap.

And work is so crazy right now and I'm doing it all by myself. This has got to change. I simply cannot do it all. But how do you go about changing such a huge system??

Uggggghhhhh. . .I need to pull myself out of this funk. But sometimes you just gotta live thru it to see the brighter side after the ugly side. Right now it's ugly. Really ugly.


And I was so excited to get away and head to the beach in a few weekends, but lo and behold, that was canceled, too. Yucky! :(

Oh, but I did get accepted to Texas State for grad school, which is exciting. I'm of course a bit worried about scheduling my classes and all that, but oh, well. (I couldn't leave this post that depressing--had to add something positive!) :)

It's not always easy and sometimes life can be deceiving
I'll tell you one thing
It's always better when we're together
~Jack Johnson

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Hmmm. . .

It will never happen the way I want it to.

I'm annoyed at my selfishness. I've let my guard down.

Let it go.

And I'm afraid that you're never coming back this way again
I'll see you soon if you come back here
I'll see you soon
To say that you want to see me, too

Monday, April 11, 2005


I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done

And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you, dear

Louder, Louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbyes
I nearly do

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you can not hear my voice
I'll be right beside you, dear

Louder, Louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

Slower, slower
We don't have time for that
All I want's to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads

Have heart, my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if its just for a few days
Making up for all this mess

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you, dear

~Snow Patrol

Friday, April 08, 2005

Never Know

Jeremy let me borrow the new Jack Johnson CD (In Between Dreams) and let me just say, it's awesome. And I impulse-bought The Cranberries' "best of" album (Stars: The Best of 1992-2002) last night and of course it's amazing, as well. *sigh* Nothin' like good music to make my day.

Do you ever think back on a time in your life when you felt something/thought something/acted on something and wonder, "Man, am I really the same person who used to feel that/think that/do that?" I had that thought the other day. . .it sometimes seems like I can't possibly be the same person I was even a year ago. I guess I'm not the same person, since we're constantly changing. But sometimes it seems like a huge difference; other times, it's small. Wow, that was profound. ;)

Mom and Mike (and maybe Leah) are coming tomorrow! Yay for family time.

I hung out with Audrey last night, and she's started doing yoga. While I was raving about it with her, though, I realized that I haven't actually practiced yoga in over a month. . .and yet I still feel the relaxing effects of it. Then I thought more about it, and I discovered that I don't feel near as worried all the time as I used to. I always found something to worry about before, but now I'm much calmer than I used to be. I'm thankful for that.

Alright, I'm out. Church events tonight and tomorrow will be keeping me quite busy--what else is new? :)

We feel certain but we’ll never, never know
It sure seems the same, give it a different name
~Jack Johnson

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

In Memory of Oliver
a.k.a. Ollie and other random names
our family cat

Barrett & Ollie Posted by Hello

whoah, look at those eyes Posted by Hello